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Wiomen, Sex, Religion... A New Blog

August 12th 2008 02:50
This blog has recently changed hands because I think that there is something to say about women, sex and religion and the previous owner decided not to continue with her idea for the blog. I like the name 'nitpicking' for this blog because it shows up how some of the most concerning issues for women, and therefore men, are reduced down to nothingness, given no meaning and not allowed to have a voice.

There aren't that many people out there willing to say that religion, and Catholicism mainly, really has caused a great deal of unnecessary pain and trauma for women... just because they are not men.


So, in response to what I think is a really, really big problem, I've taken over this blog and decided to talk about myself, my life in recent years and how my upbringing through Catholicism has caused a lot of problems in learning how to respect myself, think for myself and acknowledge my sexuality (which by the way is a big part of life, a life force you might even say) in a way that is not damaging to my sense of self-worth but which also expresses who I am.

To begin, Catholicism is full of double standards and is also completely disconnected from what people actually think, feel and know about themselves and their faith. I believe that the Catholic church, and perhaps most Christian religions (knowing very little about Islam, Hindu and Buddhist religions, though I'm learning), need to start listening to the people rather than pontificating from above.

For starters, the meaninglessness of what they preach is becoming problematic for themselves as people steer away. In recent years Buddhist service attendances have far exceeded attendance at Christian religious services combined.

The problem is that they have a great deal of money, power and political sway. Yet they are in denial of the issues within their own racks. I greatly appreciate the way that Pope Benedict apologised to the victims of priestly pedophilia in Australia, yet there is still massive problem. Firstly, the with the way the Australian arm of the church has a long way to go if it has any interest in rectifying this problem ie stripping men of their right to fully experience life, and allowing young children to suffer as a result of this.


The issues of sexual denial are part of a broader problem, but localised in the Catholic church and I think this can be used to explain something of what sexual denial does to people. To deny sexuality is also to create a space of need and desire which has no way of being met. This need and desire has only one place to go, inwards. It twists and turns and becomes a very negative force within the person holding onto it. If you are told that your sexuality is something to be denied, then you feel it is a 'bad' thing - most likely this will be unconscious. Yet, this is still a very natural and normal part of life. I sincerely doubt that God meant it to be denied to anyone and I sincerely doubt that we are more 'holy' if we do deny it!

Whilst I have no idea if the Catholic Church helps priests and nuns to deal with such a denial, if we look at the incidence of sexual abuse in the church, it seems unlikely. Moreover, many Catholic believers are facing the same problems of their sexuality being 'bad, needing to be denied and thinking that God has asked this of them... Now, I have many problems with blind faith and believing something just because the Church told you to, but many people don't see it this way. They believe that God speaks through the Church, who in turn denies them the capacity to look within and ask for their needs - whatever they might be - to be met. The Catholic Church, to my mind, is asking for more of people than we should ever be willing to give. It controls and it hurts people.

Through this blog I want to give a few examples of how that control and hurt has panned out in my life and through my family life. So, stay tuned...

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Comment by TimmyH

August 12th 2008 14:52

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